The Confidence Gap: How to Start Designing When You Feel Unready

In our landscape design membership, I get to meet with members in smaller groups...and it’s one of my favorite parts. We talk, connect, and get to know each other beyond the surface. I love hearing about their design journeys, the challenges they’re facing, and the dreams they’re building.

These designers are talented, passionate, brilliant...and so incredibly gracious. But many of them share a quiet truth: They’re not sure they know enough to start designing.

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They question their skills, their knowledge... and most of all, their confidence.

Sound familiar?

Maybe you’ve taken a few classes.
Maybe you’ve read every garden design book.
Maybe you want to put your ideas into the world, but when it’s time to sketch something or take on your first project, that creeping feeling shows up:

“I’m not ready yet.”

That moment - the space between wanting to start and feeling ready to do it - is called the confidence gap*.

And if you’re in it right now, I want you to know: You’re not alone. And there’s a way through. Even I have to work through this at times. 

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*The term "confidence gap" has been explored by writers from The Atlantic, The Confidence Code, and leadership coaches like Alicia Clark and Sophia Toh. They describe it as the space between knowing what you want to do and believing you’re “ready enough” to do it—a gap filled with self-doubt, hesitation, and self-imposed limits.

What Is the Confidence Gap?

The confidence gap is the emotional space between your desire to begin and your belief that you’re ready.
It’s filled with thoughts like:

• “What if I mess this up?”
  
• “I don’t know enough yet.”
  
• “Who am I to call myself a designer?”
  
  

This gap can make you stall out before you ever get going. But here’s the truth:

Confidence doesn’t come before the work.
It comes because of the work.

And the only way to close the gap...is to begin. 

Why Feeling Unready Is Totally Normal

You’re stepping into something creative and unfamiliar...of course you feel unsure.

Confidence doesn’t magically appear. It grows through repetition, risk, and reflection.

Feeling unready isn’t a sign of failure.
It’s a sign that you’re stretching. That you care. That you’re about to grow.

I’ll never forget what my first supervisor told me just out of college. She explained that when we’re doing work we already know, our growth looks like a straight horizontal line - steady, familiar, and comfortable.

But when we take on something new, the line tilts upward. That’s when we feel wobbly - uncertain, maybe even like an imposter. But if we keep going - learning, practicing, showing up - that line eventually levels out again. We find our footing. We reach a new plateau.

That stair-stepping pattern continues throughout life. It’s how we grow.

So if you’re in that upward-tilting moment right now - unsure, messy, questioning everything - just know:
That’s not weakness. That’s growth in motion.

You’re building confidence, one step at a time.

How to Start Designing...Even When You Feel Unready

You don’t have to feel fully confident to begin. Here are a few small, steady steps to help bridge the gap:

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Design Something Just for You. Take the pressure off. Design your own yard. A container. A fictional space from your imagination. No one has to see it. The goal is doing, not proving.

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Share One Thing Before You Feel Ready. A sketch, a concept, a before/after, a process photo...share something small in a trusted space. It could be with classmates, a mentor, or in our design membership. You’ll be surprised how much encouragement follows.

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Start a Confidence File or Journal. Collect anything that reminds you you’re making progress:

• Kind words from clients, mentors, or peers
  
• Notes from a project you completed
  
• A photo of something you created
  
• A list of things you’ve learned this year
  
• A note to yourself about why you started
  
  

Return to it whenever doubt creeps in (because it will). This is your reminder that growth is happening, even if it feels slow.

The Real Secret: Confidence Is Built, Not Given

No one hands you confidence. You build it, slowly and steadily, by:

• Showing up when it’s uncomfortable
  
• Starting small and staying consistent
• Giving yourself permission to be a beginner
  
  

You don’t have to feel ready. 

You just have to feel ready enough to try.

Confidence doesn’t come from thinking - it comes from doing. Every time you sketch something, speak up in a client meeting or click “publish” on that social media post - even when your stomach flips - you collect proof that you’re capable. And that proof adds up.

Confidence is a practice. Like sketching. Like planting. Like anything worthwhile. It takes repetition and patience. It might not feel natural at first, but the more you do it, the more second-nature it becomes.

A Final Thought

If you're standing in the confidence gap today - looking across at the version of yourself you hope to become - take one small step in her direction.

That first action - imperfect, awkward, brave - is how the gap begins to close.

You don’t have to be fearless to start.
You just have to be willing.

Let’s build your confidence from the inside out...one sketch, one idea, one garden at a time.

Start small. Stay curious. Confidence will catch up to your courage.